The Sudden Blog

OMG, he is so sibuk..

2011-07-21T13:40:00.003+08:00

You know how much I loathe Eduwingyelsdis right? He's like the most sibuk person on earth.

Sibuk as in 'kaypochi'. Not busy. All the time that I 've been here, never have I actually seen him do any work. Like seriously. Asyik merayap je kerja dia.

Anyway, he's just around. And it's annoying me. The air smells funky and there's this negative vibe on this floor. Must be him. No, it's definitely him.

Ughh..he's here again.

2011-07-21T13:28:00.001+08:00

Like seriously. Eduwingyelsdis. Blerggh.

Guess who's here?

2011-07-15T11:54:00.005+08:00

Hey all. Eduwingyelsdis is here.

He's looking at the screen...trying to see what I am writing.

Eduwingyelsdis is showing Christina the video about the boy who wore the MU t-shirt ("Jersey la. Not t-shirt. Haiyooooh!" says Eduwingyelsdis) okay, JERSEY, at the Liverpool training thingy at Bukit Jalil Stadium yesterday.

Me: How would you describe the MU fan?

Eduwingyelsdis: Bodoh. It's like going to a tiger and going "Eh, you berani...gigit la. You berani gigit la.."

Christina: Aiyoh...poor boy. Sharm, you write la stories about that poor boy.

Anyway, it is so difficult writing this post. Eduwingyelsdis is looking at me. I'm pressured. I know that he is here looking for the seventh member, (who thankfully, is not around!)

Eduwingyelsdis: If my girlfriend reads this blog...habislah. See, how selfish you are?!

We're going to makan. On Eduwingyelsdis.

This is for Bboy...=)

2011-07-14T17:33:00.002+08:00

Bboy is my other biggest fan....and wants a blog post dedicated to him...so here it is. Inspired by some of Twitter's recent trending topics, I have created a new hashtag #replacemovietitleswithbboy

Sorry sidetrack sikit.

OMG. Rizal is here.
Jastin: How?
Rizal: Minum.
Jastin: Sharm. You wanna go?

They are still looking at me. Jastin wants a reply. OMG. What?

He just said hello. If I am still sitting here and not saying anything...obviously I tak nak pergi right. Apahal dengan diorang ni? They are still here!

Jastin: Okay, nevermind.

OMG. I think he merajuk. "You merajuk ah?" I ask. "No lah, why I wanna merajuk for such things."

Rizal and Jastin...going for tea.
Rizal is laughing..a silent evil laugh. THEY ARE STILL HERE! OMG! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?

"See you tomorrow."

Back to my original blog post idea. Here are some of the titles:

Harry Potter and the Deathly Bboy

Mr Popper's Bboy

Tolong! Awek aku Bboy!

Kung Fu Bboy

X-Men: First Bboy

Green Bboy

Transformers: Dark of the Bboy

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Bboy

A Beautiful Bboy

Mysterious Bboy

Where is Rizal?

2011-07-14T17:25:00.003+08:00

That is what Jastin wants to know....he just got a phone call, and went "Hey bro."

He walked off. Most probably because he knows that I'll transcribe whatever I hear. Oh, he's back. He's looking at the screen. Still looking. Hello? What is so interesting on the screen lah..

OMG! It's Martin. He just walked past us and Jastin said hi. Then I said hi. And Martin said hi back. If only he knows that I'm updating his favourite blog. Okay, Jastin is still reading whatever I'm typing.

"Fine, I'll do my work. Oh...Rizal is here. I wanna go see Rizal. You wanna go?"

"You have lost an awful lot of weight. And I found it," says Martin. Then he realised that I'm updating the blog.

"It's sad when some things don't grow and evolve," Martin says to Jastin...and walks off.

Like seriously people. See what you're making me do. You want me to update a blog that Martin hates. And Jastin is still looking at the screen.

"I am not," he replies. Like hello...how would he know I typed that if he wasn't looking? Ish.

Nelsen's here

2011-07-14T17:17:00.004+08:00

Nelsen: Bising betul!

Jastin: Bro. Where are you going? Stay here la.

Nelsen: *fingers typing action* Settle some things sikit.

Jastin: Hmm...ahh. That's all?

He's looking at me now. And touching the mouse.

Jastin: Is that how you update ah? *turns to the right* Eh, bro...pakai lagi ah? Pink ah..

He's now talking to Ehfan about some "magical" bracelet thingy. Ehfan is behind me. Jastin is on my left. They are talking about being recalled or something.

Jastin: Why? Why? Why?

Me: Nothing.

Jastin is still looking at the screen. He can't believe that this is how I update my blog.

Haih. Drama. I asked Jastin something about a mutual friend and he replied. Then when he saw that I was actually typing his reply out, he freaked out and ask me to delete it!

Ish...doesn't he know how this blog works?

As I'm editing this blog, Jastin asks, "Eh, can edit ah?" I say yes. "Put it in la, that I asked if can edit it."

Memang susah nak layan my fans ni...

Jastin and Rizal had tea. I was there too.

2011-07-12T17:06:00.002+08:00

Me: Indra told me about what you guys did last weekend. But I can't tease you about it because Jastin is here.

Jastin: What's it about?

Me: Sorry, I can't tell you. I told Indra I won't tell anyone. I asked her permission if I can tell Nasa and Ian. She said no. Then I asked her if I can tease Rizal about it. She said yes.

Jastin: Is it about Bersih?

Me: It was inspired by Bersih. Sorry, that's all I can tell you.

Rizal: I think I know what you're talking about.

Me: (Looking at Jastin) I know it's frustrating when people want to tell you something but they won't tell you anything. I feel like slapping people like that all the time.

Jastin: I feel like slapping you now.

Bersih, tak Bersih...bahu aku sakit jugak.

2011-07-11T19:56:00.002+08:00

Okay, this post is for Jastin. You people might think that I'm being extra nice to Jastin and am always indulging him. Yes, you are right. That is because Jastin is special and I've always been told to be nice to be people who have less than us. E.g: brains.

Bersih. My story.

5am: Woke up. Showered.

6am: Picked Nasa up from her place. Was expecting her to get into the car from the passenger side. But she came in from the other side and freaked me out. Good to know she's stealthy.

6.20am: At the KL Sentral monorail station. Station empty. Only three other people on the train other than Nasa and myself. They all looked like criminals. Okay...maybe not the kakak on my right.

7am: Walked towards Swiss Garden. Called Karr Wei and woke her up. Had roti canai and kopi ais for breakfast. Fifi and Karr Wei joined us. Everyone in the restaurant macam muka suspek je. Except for us of course.

8am: Walked to Bukit Bintang with Eng Hock, Isabelle and Nasa. Met Fifi and Ong there. Ong looked like a schoolkid...but then, he always looks like that. Bukit Bintang full of media personnels. Where the hell is everyone else?

9am: Bored. Had McDonald's coffee. Nasa found out that they gave out free re-fills. We re-filled. Nasa had to pee. Went to Lot 10. Found a million people queuing up for iPad 2. Like seriously people?

10am: Walked towards BB Plaza. One of the money changer stall's alarm was going off. Like forever. Macam sial.

10.30am: Stop sekejap. Makan KFC. Smsed Christina about it. She told me took look around - just in case Ibrahim Ali was sitting next to me. Looked around. He wasn't there.

11am: Decided to take the monorail from one end to the other and see what the hell is actually going on everywhere else. The most exciting thing we saw was the Puma shoe sale at Berjaya Times Square. Or was it Imbi Plaza? I donno. Nasa had to take another pee break.

12pm: The bloody alarm's still blaring. Looked for the security company's number. Obviously, they are the worst security company in the world and I wanted to just yell at them. No one picked up.

1pm: The whole world was standing in front of KFC. Waiting for Patriots to show up. Suddenly, everyone started running towards Jalan Pudu. Don't know why. So obviously, Nasa and I did what every Malaysian in that situation would do...we followed blindly. Oh, it was the Bersih gang. Someone offered me a sticker. I said 'No thanks'.

1.20pm: Back at KFC. The damn alarm still blaring! A four-wheel drive was parked in front of it...with a bunch of people in, on and around it. They were distributing red Patriot t-shirts. KJ then came out of no where. If Nasa's theory is to be believed, he parachuted himself in. I believe her.

1.30pm: *Hoo-haaa...hoo-haaa...hoo-haaa* Bising, bising *Hidup Malaysia!* Alarm:bibubibubibubibu* Nasa and I were told to go to Petaling Street to find out what's happening there. We ran. Like marathon runners. Well, maybe slower. Then we decided to jog. Then walk.

1.45pm: Nightmare started. Nasa and I were trapped in the middle of Jalan Pudu. FRU trucks and personnels on both ends. Couldn't get out. It started to rain. Then tear gas. Nasa and I found shelter. Slightly felt the effects of tear gas. Decided to walk. And then it happened. A tear gas canister dropped right in front of me and Nasa. I went, "Nasa! RUN!"

2pm: Felt the full effect of the damn tear gas. Was asking myself "Why the hell am I here again?" We were trying to walk, breathe and not die from being trampled on. Well, that's just me...since I'm super clumsy.

I could hear Nasa coughing her lungs out behind me. I couldn't see at all. Walking with my eyes closed, holding on to some pak cik in front of me.

Then there it was - what was used to be a fence...now all flattened, with the wires sticking out. I had to cross that and the drain to get to the other side.

I had a feeling I was going to trip and bring the pak cik down with me. But I managed to stay calm and pretend I was playing 'zero-point'. I jumped across. I made it. So did the pak cik and Nasa.

Was calm enough to get the water bottle out of my bag, pour it on my eyes, wet the towel and cover my nose. Took the toothpaste out (thank you Chan Tak Kong for advising me to bring Darlie (not Colgate...but Darlie!) as a precaution) and put it under my eyes, and ate some salt.

Felt much better.

The tear gas attacks kept going on. We were hiding behind the hospital. Could see doctors (they were wearing scrubs and white jackets) on the first/second floor waving Bersih t-shirts and shouting encouraging words. Dude...tak payah operate orang ke?

Anyway, we survived more tear gas and water cannon attacks. Got out from the hospital grounds. Saw Sivarasah getting arrested. Thought it was the end of it, but no. Walked towards the FRU trucks. They fired more tear gas at us. We were like "Eh, apahal diorang ni?"

Started running again.

One dude was badly injured. His friends were like screaming for water. I went to him with my water bottle, but standing that close to him, I felt the effects as well. It was so bad, I had to pour the water on myself...and as other people started helping the dude, I told Nasa that we should get the hell out of there.

4pm: Re-grouped with Eng Hock and Isabelle. Babi punya alarm still going off! Went around interviewing people whose businesses were affected that day.

Eng Hock said that there's something going on at KLCC and we should walk towards there. Yeay, walk.

Nasa and I dragged ourselves to KLCC. Our feet were just not moving as fast as they did a few hours ago.

Then Eng Hock said we should go to Wisma MCA.

5pm: Nothing happened at Wisma MCA. Eng Hock told us to go back to the Swiss Garden hotel on Jalan Pudu. Nasa said we should hitch-hike. Saw one dude on a motorbike and the other on a bicycle. I 'chup-ed' the guy on the motorbike. Nasa said forget it.

We dragged ourselves back to the hotel. It was like forever. Then another nightmare began.

Saw a lady standing by the side of the road, with a suitcase in one hand and a confused expression on her face. I told Nasa, "If she asks for help, the only thing I can give her is water."

Like I expected, she asked for help. "Hello, miss. Do you know where is Swiss Garden hotel?

I just looked at her and said, "We are going there. Follow us."

In a nutshell, she's from China and it's her first day in Malaysia. The taxi driver dropped her off near KLCC and told her that the hotel is five minutes away. We told her that it was not. She followed us.

15 mins later.
Lady: How many more minutes?
Nasa: Fifteen.
Lady: Five-zero?
Nasa: Fifteen.
Lady: Five-zero?
Nasa: NO. ONE-FIVE!

20 mins later.
Lady: Hotel big? Can see?
Me: Yes, hotel big. But you can't see from here.

23 mins later.
Lady: Can see hotel?
Me: No.

25 mins later.
Lady: Can see hotel?
Me & Nasa: *ignore*

30 mins later.
Lady: Can see hotel now?
Me: Apasal perempuan gila ni? Dah lah menyusahkan orang, bising nak mampus.
Nasa: OMG, she's so annoying.

We reached Jalan Bukit Bintang.
Nasa: Sharm, what's different here?
Me: I donno.
Nasa: The damn alarm is off!
Me: YEAY!
Lady: Can see hotel now?

Finally, at Jalan Pudu.
Me: There. Can you see Swiss Garden. That is your hotel.
Lady: Aaah...I can see. Thank you.

Nasa gave her directions to the main lobby. We had to walk in a different direction. Thank god. Screeching sound. Turned around. Lady almost got knocked down by a motorbike. Seriously lady, we didn't bring you all the way to the hotel just to see you die in front of it!

7pm: Reached hotel. Sent in story. Balik rumah.

8pm:
Me: Mom, I can't walk.
Mom: Don't even complain about today. You asked for it.

10pm: Shower + painkillers + muscle relaxant = Tidur mati.

OMG..it's hard being a famous blogger!

2011-07-11T19:50:00.002+08:00

I hate being famous. I really do.

I mean, I just walked over to the Metro side and Jastin was like..."Eh, how come you haven't updated your blog?"

Didn't I just update it like a few hours ago?

Anyway, Jastin is at his place...and on his right is Chia Ying and on her right is Christina. Karr Wei is not around today.

None of the PCs over there are switched on, so I didn't want to you know...start the computer...log in..and then update this blog. Banyak kerja.

So, I'm at my place now.

Niki just left. Ian is behind me. I don't know what he's doing.

Monday. It is.

2011-07-11T15:32:00.003+08:00

Hello everybody,

I am trying to write my article. But I can't just yet...coz the dude I need to interview is driving and I can't talk to him because I promised Oprah that I won't talk/text on the phone while driving and therefore I shouldn't encourage others either.

Oh, I also have a new fan. Norlin. *Hi, Norlin!* She's a real person.

Lohan is behind me...talking to Nasa and Ian. They are talking about some clinic.

"How come I didn't see anything fun like that?" asks Nasa.

Ian is laughing. Lohan left.

Oh...Nasa just walked away. Ian is now behind me, writing his article. Wait, let me turn around and check. Yup, he is. He's also scratching his nose.

Ivy is opposite me...looking all stressed. Most probably she can't find her desktop icon. Niki is talking to the Goh brothers. Kelly is standing. Daryl is sitting. Niki laughed. He's still laughing.

Sheela just walked past me. She's wearing pink.

Ok, I have to go now.

But before that. Three things you need to know about Szeto boy.

1. What he had for lunch: Fried rice
2. What is his favourite number: *blank stare* (I don't think he knows how to count)
3. What he's wearing: A t-shirt that says "It's not easy being easy."

p/s: AMC just came and asked me to help proof-read a page. Something about Harry Potter. I really need to go now. "Adios!" (No, that's not a spell!)

All alone

2011-07-07T20:07:00.002+08:00

Hello everyone. How have you been? Actually I don't care. Just formalities, you know?

Anyway, I'm in pain. My shoulder hurts again. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. Need to do X-Ray and MRI.

Have you done an MRI before? I hate it. The last time I did it, the dude who jaga the machine said that I was very still. Haha...that's because I fell asleep.

And I also hate taking X-Rays. I donno. Simply I guess.

Anyway, I'm alone in the office. Okayla...not alone, alone. Daryl is at his terminal, working...no wait...scratching his head. I can see Malini.

It feels stuffy here. And I'm feeling warm cause I'm wearing a hoodie. Maybe I should take it off, then I won't feel so warm.

My desk is messy.

Haiku for Fei Chai

2011-07-07T19:59:00.002+08:00

I have a friend. His name is Fei Chai. Some people call him Fei Fei. But I call him Fei Chai.

Anyway, this post is dedicated to him...as he, without fail greets me everyday and asks about this blog.

So, this is for you Fei Chai. My favourite...haiku.

Oh my dear Fei Chai
Makan, minum dan tidur....
Tu je you tau kan?

Kami tak kisah
Cuma risau yang awak
Akan meletup

Kita pergi ke
Bootcamp bersama-sama
Jadi kurus ye

U akan jadi
Macam Johnny Depp muda
Tapi lagi kiut...=)

Let it be known that ....

2011-01-29T22:15:00.002+08:00

I love Junior Masterchef Australia. I hope that Cassidy or maybe one of the twins wins the competition.

*Omg, my neighbour's party is still going strong. And I can hear the music from my room. Would I be a total party pooper if I called the cops on them?*

So, anyway, I think that it is totally awesome that these kids are given a chance to show just how good they are in the kitchen, and just what geniuses they are with food.

Eh, I forgot to tell you

2011-01-29T00:48:00.005+08:00

I'm like super artistic right? Like so artistically gifted that if Da Vinci was alive, I'd be teaching him how to hold a paintbrush and stuff.

So yeah, I like to doodle and draw and one day, I had an idea. Why not do a comic strip on Indra? You know...that homeless lady who lives on 3A.

Oh, you don't know Indra? Well, here's a picture of her. Sorry, I had to blur it a little bit - she's the shy-shy type.

So far, I've done a few comic strips for Indra (the porn star and Vegetable Girl series) and she said that she'll upload them to her blog one day.

That requires acts like scanning and stuff and I seriously don't think that Indra knows how to operate anything more technologically advanced than a toaster. Hmm...we'll just have to wait and see, I guess.

So yeah...I just wanted to tell you that; that I'm artistic and stuff. Bye.

Woof! Woof!

2011-01-29T00:13:00.005+08:00

OMG...this is the first post about Bobby...my dog. Let's have a minute of silence to appreciate this moment and save it in our memory banks like forever.

Okay, I'm done. Are you?

You know how much I love animals right? Like I would die for them although the chances of me dying because of them seems much higher.

Oh, you know. All that fried chicken I consume has to go somewhere and I'm pretty sure they'll end up clogged in my vena pulmonary, resulting in my untimely death after I suffer a cardiac arrest the moment I get on stage to receive my second Nobel Peace Prize before I hit the age of 40.

Phew, that's one heck of a long sentence. *Kids, don't try that at home*

Nyeh...don't freak out. It won't come true. The cardiac arrest I mean. Erm, you people are evil. Let me touchwood x3 just to be on the safe side. Okay, it won't come true. The cardiac arrest, I mean. Focus people!

Erm, where was I? Oh yeah, animal lover. Well, this is not a post about the dog abuse video clip that everyone is talking about. Though on a separate note, I hope that the poodle rips that filthy, evil man's hoo-has out!

This post is about my dog, Bobby Brown.

Uhmm, erm...honestly though, I'm getting a little bit malas to continue. I love my dog and all...but I don't feel like writing anymore. So that's all.

Good night peeps. May the force be with you.

Oh my god...it's 2011 already!

2011-01-28T23:46:00.005+08:00

Greetings Earth people,

It has been ages since I last updated this blog...and it's not because nothing happened but more of because I was simply too lazy. Yeah, so what's new right?

Jastin has been bugging the heck out of me to update this goddamn blog. I seriously need to get that boy a life...I mean, after I get one for Eduwingyelsdis of course.

Anyway, Martin, the man who I dedicate this blog to, is nowhere to be seen during normal office hours. So, I really have nothing to blog about. Everybody is going about doing their own thing and yeah...that's pretty much it.

People say that Martin is working in a new department, has a new work schedule and only comes to work at night..yada, yada...though I personally think that he's turned into a vampire.

I mean, he has always had a thing for sparkly, pale, skinny boys and I know just how much he loves Edward Cullen. So, I wouldn't be surprised if one day Martin announces to the world that he's actually a blood sucking creature by the name of Bella Swan. Lol.

Okay, so anyway...the reason why I'm writing this post is to announce to my three and a half (you know who you are) readers that I'm thinking about switching up the way I blog a little bit.

You know how I always focus on people in the office and stuff, but honest to god, there's only so much I can write about them. I've decided to also start blogging about the most important thing in the world....me.

I recently met a friend who said that she misses my blog and that I should start blogging again (like the way I used to); and since I'm super malas to start another blog from scratch, I have decided to just continue it from here la.

Hope you people understand...not that I care if you don't. I'm just telling you la.

But don't start panicking just yet. I will still continue to post mudane things about the office people and try to get more dirt on them. I know that you people are hooked to what happens in my office, though I have no idea why.

Say hi to your boss/teachers for me. They are doing a great job at creating an awesome working/studying environment for you...so much so that you need to live vicariously through me...someone who doesn't have a life either.

Get on the boat. We'll sink together. Oh no wait...I know how to float. Every man for himself then.

Martin is here

2010-12-20T19:39:00.003+08:00

You mean you have an encylopedic memory of your brother's porn collection?

You can't write that.

You're just one of the hypocrites? Haiyoh! I used to admire you so much.

It's a Piscean trait.

And I said it sounds fishy to me.

OMG... this blog is losing its meaning.

I almost killed Martin

2010-11-25T01:13:00.003+08:00

It was quiet in Basement 3. I was in my car and right in front of me was Martin. There was no one else around. Recipe for the perfect murder? I thought so too.

I stepped on the accelerator and drove straight in his direction.

But then I had a change of heart. I had just washed my car and didn't feel like getting any dirt on it.

The end.

p/s: Please don't use this blog post against me in the court of law. I have and will not ever commit murder. I'm a nice person...seriously. Blood freaks me out.

Ian got a haircut and we all laughed at it

2010-11-25T01:07:00.004+08:00

Well, I didn't laugh lah. Nasa did.

Anyway, I think it has grown since then.....

Someone had a party and we decided to show up..

2010-11-25T00:35:00.011+08:00

I don't wanna tell you whose birthday party it was...but we were all there. By we, I mean the losers who had nothing better to do than to show up and eat free food.

Eh, no wait...we were actually there to support Daryl who finally got recognition for all his hard work in the past 100 years with the company. He got a house, a Ferrari, two ponies and a magic carpet.

Daryl wore a pink tutu and looked every inch the princess that he is....errmm...I'm confused...maybe it was Eduwingyelsdis?

Here are some of the losers:

That's Eduwingyelsdis and Nelsen.

And here is Leong. The guy Nelsen left to be with Eduwingyelsdis. Nelsen tried to apologise for his stupid move by offering cotton candy....but Leong didn't want any of it. He wanted one of Daryl's ponies.

Oh, and here is a replica of the statue Nelsen made for Eduwingyelsdis. It is of Eduwingyelsdis touching himself inappropriately.

That's all.

Princess Eduwingyelsdis

2010-11-25T00:15:00.005+08:00

This is his Bible. He reads it (actually, he gets Nelsen to read it to him) every night before bedtime.

Eduwingyelsdis is a princess....and now with proof.

Anyway, I'm not at work...

2010-11-25T00:14:00.002+08:00

So yeah...I'm updating this blog from home. My mother asked me why is it that I'm always home and if I was fired from work.

Most hated question...

2010-11-25T00:05:00.002+08:00

You know...the one question that I hear on almost a daily (wait, let's make that hourly) basis is: "When are you updating your blog?"

OMG...people (and by people I mean Jastin Bibir)...don't you have like other things to do....like work?

Apahal asyik nak baca blog aku je ni? First of all, it's not even that interesting (don't tell Martin I said that...although I know that he's reading this right now).

Secondly, even I also don't want to baca this blog, let alone update it. Kan I told you already...my boss marah...she said I cannot update this blog during working hours. Besides that...I'm so very the busy.

Anyway, I also understand lah, that you people have very limited entertainment in your lives. How many times can you look at Martin's face and laugh right?

It's funny the first 100 times...but after that, it's just another face...kan?

Therefore, I have decided to update this blog...and also to shut Jastin Bibir up. So yeah...hope you're happy.

I'm still waiting...

2010-09-30T13:05:00.001+08:00

Karr Wei and Christina are taking forever to go for lunch.

I was just sitting there (doing my work) when Karr Wei called me out for lunch. Now that I'm here (I've been here for the past 30 minutes) they are still not done with whatever it is that they're doing.

Christina, the resident lembab girl....is taking forever to do something. When I ask her if we're good to go, she said "Yup...but no one's moving."

Karr Wei just stood up abruptly. Now she's fiddling with her phone. Christina is looking at me.

Oh, I'm holding them up now.

Gotta go.

Martin is wearing a shirt...

2010-09-24T18:33:00.002+08:00

Like a real proper shirt.

With buttons.

Not a t-shirt...but like a real shirt, shirt. What's up with that?

Apparently he had to meet a President who was like 70in taller than him and people had to squat or kneel in front of him if they wanted to talk to him.

But the President didn't feel like squatting because he wanted to stand and show off just how tall he was. Or something like that.

Jaya just asked me how to spell boobies. I replied, "B-O-O-B-I-E-S."

And Martin left his back pack at the embassy and he was scared that the people there would call the bombsquad or something...yeah, I think they'll call a squad to get rid of that bag alright. Have you seen it before? It's hideous...I asked Martin how to spell hideous...and he typed my name on Google.

Martin just Googled my name! And it's like number one on the page...wow. I'm famous!

Now Martin is typing something on his ancient phone....yeah, the kind Alex Bell used back in his days.

Christina is busy doing work. She's on my left. Martin is on my right and on his right is Jaya.

Ing Yeen and Jade are talking about satay...or something that rhymes with satay. Jade just said.."Lepak sikit la.."

Xin Yi looks super stressed.

Oh, I forgot. I asked Martin which Disney cartoon he loves the most. He said Aladdin...

I asked Martin what he had for lunch. He's quiet now...still quiet...still quiet....

Jaya answered: "He had rice with lots of curry in it."

Martin just looked exasperated. He's glaring at Jaya now.

"What? You looked at me...," protested Jaya.

"I'm trying to find a way to stop this...," said Martin.

"You can kill her," Jaya suggested.

Okay...I need to leave before somebody kills me. Bye!

p/s: Ooh...just found out that Martin wanted a Hammer and Sickle tattoo when he was younger...but now that he's older and his skin is saggy....the tattoo artist won't do it. Oh, apparently, he's not getting it is because he's too hairy..and there's no area on his body that he can shave and have that tattoo. Gorilla.

New look..

2010-09-15T15:19:00.000+08:00

Amacam? Okay tak..?

I am in SHOCK!

2010-09-02T18:00:00.003+08:00

I can't believe that there is a negative side to the man whom I thought had no flaws (except for his birth and existence).

I just heard Martin say a very nasty thing about his ex-boyfriend..

Fazleena just interrupted me! She looked at the title and read it aloud and I had a bit of a drama moment where I slammed the mouse and declared that I don't want to blog anymore.

Martin looked at her and said "Could Michelangelo (I stopped to ask Fazleena how to spell Michelangelo, and she in turn asked me to ask Martin).

"Martin, is this how you spell Michelangelo M-I-C-H-E-L-A-N-G-E-L-O?," I asked.

"If I helped you it'd would imply tacit approval of ...(something about me writing my blog)," he replied pompously. Babi lu.

Ermm...where was I...yeah "Could Michelangelo create masterpieces with people staring at his work? Could a dog pee on a fire hydrant with people looking at it?" said Martin to Fazleena.

So yeah. I'm back. Fazleena just left and Martin is on the phone with someone...he has a very bored expression on his face (well, he usually does...coz he's a boring person, right?)

Anyway...back to the first thing that I was talking about..I was shocked to hear Martin say some nasty things about this dude (who I think he had a crush on but was rejected. I'm not surprised...I mean..have you seen Martin before?)

He sounded extremely bitter and said a few harsh things about this guy...tsk, tsk!

Wow, you think you know a person and they just turn out to be even worse than what you originally thought of them. Haih...

Well, it's a good thing I never thought much about Martin.

Loser.

Are you ready to die....

2010-08-31T19:50:00.010+08:00

And go to burger heaven?

If you answered yes...then you so totally must try the Matterhorn (I asked Christina how to spell it. Is it M-A-T-T-E-R-H-O-R-N? She just looked confused and said "Yah, I think so.)

Anyway, this Matterhorn is a bad ass 3kg burger that can be found exclusively at Eurodeli (that's where I first met B*boy!)

I've been trying to get Mel and Ian and the rest of the gang to participate in the Matterhorn challenge...where you have to eat the huge ass burger in under 45mins.

Mel is confident that she's able to finish it, but she's a little shy to be forever known as 'the girl who finished it'. So, we'll leave it at that.

When I asked Daryl if he wanted to try it...he chickened out by saying "I am a vegetarian." He is not. Lame.

I asked Ian..he said something. I forgot.

So yes, anyway...I finally had the chance to see people try the Matterhorn and live to talk about it. Siapa you tanya? Nelsen, Eduwingyelsdis (he's a ding dong...I don't feel like typing his name properly), Karr Wei, Christina and Sia.

Check this bad boy out. Sorry for the poor quality image...you're not special...so I didn't feel like taking a proper picture. Deal with it.

Besar giler babi kan?

Everybody was malu-malu kucing konon to try out the burger. Dah ada kat depan mata...makan je lah.

Eduwingyelsdis and Karr Wei nak bermanja-manja pulak, sharing the burger la, cut into small pieces la..sekeh kepala tu kang, baru tau. But Karr Wei makan the pickles je. The other guy, apa nama, Eduwingyelsdis...he just played around with it.

Ni la muka si Eduwingyelsdis yg tak berapa hensem itu:

The only person who took up the challenge and ate a quarter of the burger all by himself was Nelsen (who was a bit kampung and asked for chilli sauce. Actually, I pun kampung jugak. I asked for the chilli sauce first). Slowly but surely, Nelsen anihilated his portion.

Wanna see his face? Not Brad Pitt level la...but better than Eduwingyelsdis for sure.

*Aiyah..this blog post is getting a bit too long. I'm starting to feel lazy already. Let me take a pee break k. See you in a bit.*

*Okay, I'm back. Let's wrap up this damn post. Anyway, Christina just asked if I wanted a wine or beer drinking session. Dua-dua pun aku tak minat. So, I tak kisah. Anywhere also can.*

So yeah..after we finished eating half of the Matterhorn, I thought that it'd be a great idea to show off my colouring skills to others. B*boy..who is like the nicest person on earth...asked his staff to bring colour pencils for us and even moderated the contest.

But unfortunately he's a moderator kayu because he let Karr Wei take more than one colour pencil at a time (hello, I need to use the colour pencils as well!)and was extremely lenient with contestants who broke competition rules (like shaking the table, etc). Haih, need to get a professional judge next time.

Anyway, I...the artistic one...knew that I was going to win the contest even from the start but I was very modest about it. I didn't want to discourage the rest of them from doing their best even though they were up against a world-class colour-er.

To be totally fair, B*boy got one of his staff members to choose the winning entry. I signalled the nice lady to choose Karr Wei's entry (because honestly, it was ugly and I'm a gracious person and I wanted Karr Wei to feel special.)

So she chose Karr Wei's. I congratulated her...but the rest of the patrons in the restaurant protested. Some threw chairs and even broke into tears at the unfairness. They knew who the real winner was. It was me. I knew it too, but I just kept quiet.

B*boy then got another of his staff member to pick the winner...and she chose me. I couldn't say anything. If they want me to be the winner...what can I say right?

Here's my entry:

Here's Karr Wei's entry:

Buruk kan? But don't tell her...she'll merajuk.

p/s: Eduwingyelsdis didn't join the colouring contest. He doesn't know how to use colour pencils.

Okay, I'm tired already. Bye all.

OMG..I'm back.

2010-08-31T19:41:00.002+08:00

Hey all...it's been a long time since I last updated this blog right? I'm sure you guys have TOTALLY missed me.

Well, I'm pretty sure Martin misses me. Right Martin? I know you're reading this blog right now...so stop pretending as if you don't know it exists.

OMG! I have to tell you something. I have a fan who loves (okay, maybe love is a strong word here...but we'll just go with it, k?) this blog, and no...he is not imaginary.

This dude B*boy (yoo hoo! See, I'm mentioning you. You're famous!)thinks that this is the best blog in the world and that I should be awarded for it or something. He also said that he's never been more entertained by a writer who not only captures the essence of journalism, but also presents it in a laid-back manner.

I was speechless when I heard him say it. Well, of course I couldn't say anything back...because he said nothing of that kind. This conversation took place in my head.

All he said was that he likes this blog and totally loved the Attack of the Killer Hand video that I shot. *thanks*

p/s: Christina is on my right busy working on a presentation. Karr Wei is out having dinner with people she doesn't even like...most probably Martin.

Salam 1 Malaysia

2010-06-24T18:27:00.003+08:00

Saya kini berada di tingkat 3A bersama rakan-rakan saya, Karr Wei dan Christina. Ini adalah percubaan kali pertama bagi saya untuk menaip blog ini dalam Bahasa Malaysia.

Di zaman persekolahan dahulu, saya agak fasih bertutur dan menulis di dalam Bahasa Malaysia. Saya juga merupakan salah seorang pelajar bukan Melayu yang sangat cemerlang di dalam mata pelajaran ini. Saya selalu mendapat markah tertinggi dalam mata pelajaran ini dan rakan-rakan sekelas saya memang cemburu akan pencapaian saya. Ada juga rakan-rakan saya yang berbangsa Melayu yang pernah mememberitahu saya bahawa mereka kagum dengan cara saya bertutur dan menulis dalam bahasa kebangsaan ini.

Namun begitu, setelah saya meninggalkan sekolah menengah dan menyambung pelajaran tinggi di kolej swasta, saya kurang menggunakan Bahasa Malaysia dengan kawan-kawan saya, maka saya pun menjadi kurang terrer dalam BM.

Kini, saya bertekad untuk menulis lebih banyak warkah dan rencana menggunakan Bahasa Malaysia supaya saya tidak lupa akan bahasa ini.

Sekian, terima kasih.

Yang benar,
Saya lah..siapa lagi.

Back by popular demand

2010-06-03T16:33:00.003+08:00

Hello. I'm back. Martin is on my right and he's complaining about how Karr Wei and Christina are supporting me in my attempt to revive this blog.

Like I've mentioned many times...Martin is a sad guy who needs attention.

"Why is our picture on Pix for Caption?" screams Karr Wei. "Priya Menon!" says Xin Yi. They're talking about some money thingy...I don't know what it's about.

"Yeay...I'm happy for you guys. Now everyone knows you have money," says Christina.

Martin is still on my right..hasn't moved an inch since I saw him two minutes ago. Oh, he just flipped the paper, trying to look as if he's reading something interesting. Yeah right.

Christina is furiously typing an article about giving up nasi ayam or something. I'll read it when it's published.

3A is pretty busy today. Everybody is here and they're all doing something...I'm not sure if its all work related though.

Martin moved. Big achievement. He's scrolling the page..ooh..its FB...and he's now reading the paper again.

Xin Yi is waaaaay over to my left. She's scratching her chin right now. I told her that she looks pretty enough to play the second wife character in a Chinese drama. She said she'll give acting a try if she doesn't succeed as a journalist.

Okay, I gotta go finish my work. Three things you should know about Martin...like now.

What did you have for lunch?: He's thinking...and says "I can't remember. Some vegetarian stuff."

What's your favourite number?: 3 ("That's all he can count to," explains Yoga)

When did you last go to the toilet?: When are you going to Sarawak. Is there any way you can catch an earlier flight?...Hmmmm, Martin is no fun.

"I don't know which is sadder..this blog or the fact that Karr Wei walked all the way here to check it out," says Martin to Yoga. He's jealous.

Bye all.

My first movie!

2010-04-02T20:20:00.009+08:00

You so totally have to watch this 'movie' that I directed. It's totally the next Avatar!

Thank you to Ian, Mel and Sean who agreed to be featured in my maiden movie. I'll so mention you guys in my thank you speech when I win an award for this excellent work.

p/s: Sean did the whole editing and whatever nonsense you have to do to videos before uploading them thingy. Thanks!

p/s2: I may re-release this movie in 3D!

How I got a headache...

2010-04-02T19:14:00.003+08:00

So I was just sitting there looking pretty when Mel said, "Hey look what I found!" and held a pair of vintage 3D glasses. Okay, maybe not vintage but just plain old.

She asked me if I wanted it and I said no (or maybe she didn't ask me at all...) and offered it to Ian instead. He went, "I can use it for my 3D iPhone application!"

So he tried it on and it kinda worked. Of course I sibuk'ed and asked him if I could try it too, and he let me.

I put on the 3D glasses and played the game (fly a jet through posts or something like that la..nothing fancy) and it was magical.

Two minutes later, I took off the glasses and saw red and blue spots all over. I thought I was going to die!!!!

The darn 3D glasses gave me a headache for the rest of the day and I swear it still hurts until now. True story.

Back to square one

2010-04-02T17:57:00.007+08:00

We're back in 3A...like for real. After moving down to lobby, then packing our stuff up to 7th floor, we've returned to where we started from.

(We're not situated at the exact location where we were three years ago, though).

One major thing on our minds after hearing about the move was: "Where the hell are we going to put all of our stuff?"

In Ivy's words, "We moved from a mansion into an apartment and now finally we're moving into a room," - so we had to find ways to stuff our crap in the limited space we have here.

Miraculously, we found comfortable spots for our sofa, table, stuff from horror room, and more crap that we collected in that one year or so we were upstairs. We also had a potted plant, but somehow, Ivy managed to 'secret' it's disappearance.

The new 'home' feels...ermm, cold. Literally speaking. I mean, a dead body could be lying somewhere here and we wouldn't find out, because it'll be kept chill like forever, you know...like cold cuts.

Anyway, one good thing that came out of the move is that I've managed to reduce my big stash of crap to a small stash of crap.

It was kind of painful to throw away unwanted notebooks (into the recycling bin!) but I gots to do what I gots to do...and I'm finally home at my workstation - crap and all.

Ian is behind me now, working on something. Can't see what he's doing. Mel sits on my left and Nasa behind her.

Yoo hoo!

2009-11-05T16:30:00.003+08:00

Hey there,

What have you been up to? Me..well nothing much except for work. And oh, did you know that my neck bone is now totally curving the opposite way it is supposed to? That's why I've been literally having a pain in my neck for more than a year already. Gotta go for more physio.

I'm on the 7th floor right now. NE is out for assignment and Lam the Intern is doing something behind there. Wait, the phone is ringing. It's IS...looking for NE. K, wait..I gotta call NE and ask her if she's put in the Campus News or not.

Talking on the phone with NE. The story is in. Gotta call IS and tell her the slug. K, done.

Well, it's quiet around here, except for the whirring of the air-conditioner...and the sound people clicking away on their keyboards.

K, my shoulder hurts. I gotta stand up and move. Bye.

I'm back..

2009-10-22T14:45:00.003+08:00

Every time I see Martin, he tells me how much he misses this blog, so here I am, updating it.

How are the rest of you losers doing? I'm feeling peachy, in fact, I might just get one of the voices in my head to sing a song for me. Tra, la, la...

So, here I am in 3A, taking a quick break, and Martin - the King of All Losers - is on my left. He's moving his mouse around...yeah, it's so gonna make you look busy. Next to him is Christina, and next to her is Karr Wei.

They're talking, about something. I can't really hear them, so I can't transcribe...sorry.

Sam just said bye to me and Jade said that they're off to the airport...

Breaking news: Martin said that the Sudden Blog should have a sudden death...why does he always have to pretend that he hates this blog? This is the only blog that'll ever mention his name!

Karr Wei just said, "Sh***, SH****** N*** why are you not responding to me?"

Christina asks which blog I'm updating...and I tell her it's the Sudden Blog. Martin reminds her that I shouldn't be encouraged.

Karr Wei has a pain (I personally think it's Martin) somewhere and she just said "something, something, something, What kind of a friend are you?"

Well, excuse me, Karr Wei...I'm a friend who's busy updating a very popular blog! Don't be a hater.

K...I gotta go. But before I do, you have to know this.

Martin had vegetarian banana leaf for lunch..and he enjoyed it.

Save the last dance

2009-09-13T21:59:00.008+08:00

Hey there everyone...and by everyone I mean my two loyal readers who still remain anonymous to me. I picked two because it's more than just one person...and that's almost a crowd.

Okay, so I managed to talk Mel into accompanying me to Twestival KL...an event where Twitterers gathered to meet one another and also raise money for a good cause.

(If one of the greatest things about Twitter is that it connects everyone no matter where they are, then what's the point in making them gather in one spot? Sure beats the purpose. Nope NC, I didn't ask that question!)

But it was a successful event, no doubt about that. Good music, great food (if you like cupcakes, hotdogs and ice cream) and free beer. They gave away good stuff, auctioned off great stuff and made more than RM10k by the end of the night.

Back to the free beer part. Ian had a few and Mel...well, Mel...she had way too many for me to keep count. But the best thing about all that beer in Mel was that she agreed to a dance with a guy for charity. And by charity I mean that he was a charity case.

That guy is a terrible dancer,a total Darren if you know what I mean...and the funny part is that he didn't know that Mel was dancing with him. Haha...

Okay, it was damn jahat of us...but what the hell.

FYI. there were two such charity cases that night. Mel danced with one, and I with the other. But in Ian's words "At least he's having a good time..."

Okay, so technically you can't see anything in this video..but that just goes to show that it's one of the 'oh, you should've been there' kinda thingy'.

Mel and her Bramuda Triangle

2009-08-23T19:50:00.004+08:00

OMG..total milestone moment. I just added a video to my post...despite the negative remarks I got from NC and IS. Total haters.

Anyway, the video above was taken at the office...at our black table (it's a black table..and that's how we refer to it).

We were having lunch and it was the Spongebob and Friends shaped pasta thingy that Mel made for us. It was ok. Nothing to shout about...ok, ok..I'm kidding! It was delicious and I'm really thankful that Mel actually took the time out of her busy day to make us that darn thing.

So...there we were having lunch when suddenly moles became our conversation topic. Yeah, I know...how the hell does mole become topic...but what the hell, it's better than our usual boobjob, penis enlargement and Ebola topics.

That's when Mel said that she has three moles on her chest.

I decided that it's only appropriate that I try to connect the moles and form a triangle...with my eyes closed!! And what do you know? It actually forms a segi tiga sama sisi!

Ian calls it the BRAmuda Triangle...LOLZ. And when I asked Mel how many men have gotten lost in her Bramuda Triangle, she said "Quite a few."

And she gets mad when we call her the basikal pekan...tsk, tsk.

Another one bites the dust...

2009-08-13T21:28:00.004+08:00

Okay..so 2009 officially sucks (at least for today). First I lost my uncle (who played a major role in not only my childhood...but the rest of my 12 cousins), my grandfather, Michael Jackson and now...one of my favouritest TV characters of all time.

He's a character from Prison Break and I'm not gonna tell who it is cos I've had people stop talking to me just because I said Johnny Depp dies in Pirates 2. But hey, I said that because I thought the whole world (including absolute dumbasses) had already known that Johnny would be returning in the third installment. But wth...I don't want to go there.

So yeah. Somebody important in Prison Break dies in Season 4...and I totally didn't expect it. I'm so sad, I swear tears are running down my face as I'm typing this. I feel so lost....fruck...LOST...don't tell me they're going to kill Jack or Sawyer or Kate in the final season?!!! Aiyoh.

Prison Break is a special series for me, because in all my life spent in front of the television (and I have spent A LOT of time in front of the TV. Been jobless for 2 years? Didn't think so. I was and that's how I got to know who's who in the Bold and the Beautiful and General Hospital) Prison Break is the only series that I actually finished.

I mean from the very first episode to the last. The one other series that comes close to that feat is 3rd Rock from the Sun. I've watched all the episodes except for the LAST one! So, until now I don't know if Dick Solomon told Mary Albright that he's actually an alien.

Anyway, Prison Break is really special to me and I was introduced to the series by NME. She gave me Season 3 and that's how I got started. Yup, season 3 when they had already escaped Fox Pen. and also exonerated. I finished it and fell in love with Michael, Linc, Sucre and even Brad Bellick. Then I figured that I might as well watch the first two seasons...so I did, by logging on to surfthechannel.com (also introduced by NME).

When I watched the first season, I'd be close to pissing in my pants, wondering if they'd get out of the damn prison (hello! Season 3 in a totally different prison in a different country?). Everything surprised me and I knew that I was hooked to it for life.

So when I heard that there'd be a Season 4 and somebody we thought was dead in Season 3 will be back...I figured that the series has gone down the drain. I had reservations and almost didn't want to watch the final season..until NME lent me the box set.

Again, I was on Prison Break diet. No, it didn't help me lose any weight....but sleep ada lah. My poor mom thought that I was actually doing work and that's why I was not helping with the housework. And Bobby Brown was totally neglected. What? He's just a dog. He'll come running back to me when I wave that chicken, bacon, dog treat thingy.

Well, today I watched the last episode of Prison Break and I swear I wish I hadn't. I rather have kept the memory of knowing that the gang is out somewhere...still on the run, instead of this ending.

I'm sad. It's a sad, sad, sad day for me. Anyway, it's Michael Scofield who dies. So long bitches.

Hey losers, wassup?

2009-07-27T19:38:00.003+08:00

Hiya all,

It's been like what..three years (okay fine, five months) since I last updated this blog? Well, don't worry..nothing much has changed except for my waistline. It's bigger...don't even bother making a comment about it k.

I've already given up that goddamn fried chicken (today is the first day). I 'promised' Mel, NC and Ian that I'll only allow myself to indulge in that straight-from-hell-and-to-your-hips piece of chicken on Sept 14. Aiyoh..seems so far away..but I'm pretty sure I can do it.

Oh, I lied when I said nothing much has changed. We're no longer at the lobby (no, we were not the doorkeepers)..and have moved up to the 7th floor. You wanna know where Michael Jackson's body is? It's somewhere on this floor...which is why the goddamn air-cond is always blasting at it's fullest and there's always a foul smell around. It's so cold that when you pee...it's like you're peeing ice water. Okay, scratch that image. Let's move on.

Ian is on my right doing the much loved (oohh...can you sense that sarcasm there?) panel for Wednesday. I'm supposed to be working on my Wed story already, but unfortunately, the people I need to interview, can only get back to me later...isyh.

Oh, it's 7.47pm now...which means that I gotta leave soon...I have an appointment with my ticket to heaven. And I've not gone for my swimming classes for quite sometime now, because of my shoulder injury...oh...did I tell you about my shoulder 'injury'? It got hurt in a wakeboarding accident in South America...okay fine, it didn't. I just woke up one day and it hurt like hell. That one day was one year ago.

K..I really gotta go. I don't love you but I love the one next to you. Take care and may god bless me and me alone. Peace out.

Everybody Hates Martin

2009-03-30T17:49:00.002+08:00

On my right is Martin. He's opening his ancient briefcase and takes out an almost obsolete camera! OMG! I don't even know why he's here...he should be living with the cavemen or something.
I'm sure he grew up playing fetch with dinosaurs...I swear!

Shaari just picked up my handphone and gave it to me. He's such a nice guy. On my left is Jastin. He's working on something.

Now Martin is humming a terrible tune. This tone-deaf, lame excuse for a singer is playing chess online. I thought you needed brain (that actually works) to play that boring game. NVM.

I'm feeling so sleepy. It's very quiet here. The air-conditioner is making a funny noise. The type of noise that you hear in a Thai horror movie where the ghost with long hair stays in the air vent or something.

Martin just played the lamest trick on earth! It's so lame, I don't even wanna blog about it.

Gotta go home and read my Captain Underpants books...or maybe watch Dexter. Or maybe sleep.

Take care. Don't drink and drive. Martin, go to hell.

I'm not dead

2009-03-20T16:51:00.003+08:00

Hola!

I know it's been years since I last updated this blog...but that was simply because I was malas. What's new, right?

Anyway, I'm at 3A now...discussing with Karr Wei about her potential pakwe coming to visit her. Woohoo! I can't discuss much further..yet.

Ing Yeen is on my left, and next to her is Christina. Faridah is on my right. She's writing an article...

Karr Wei is behind me, talking to Yoke Teng and Salina. They're discussing about something very boring..no one is laughing, that's how I could tell.

Oh, Karr Wei told me that she has cirit birit today. Sometimes she likes to tell me things that I rather not know.

Faridah just asked me to help think of a headline for a story about balloons..."I'm thinking," I tell her.

Karr Wei is on my left now. "Do you eat assam?" she asks. She hands me a small bowl-ful of assam. They look funny...like all assams do.

I nod my head.

"I think I need to do a map...how ah?" says Karr Wei. Of course I have no idea what she's talking about.

She just took an assam and is chewing on it...like mad.

Jastin is back. He said "Hi!" and gives a sheepish smile.

"Go and minum some more," scolds Karr Wei.

"What? Minum beer?" I ask him. FYI: It's 5.03pm.

"No lah. Just teh-O," he says.

Top four things you should know about Jastin like right now...

What he had for lunch: Buttermilk Chicken Bento (from Commons)
What's his favourite colour: Purple
Number of times he went to toilet today: Twice
His ideal girl: "I don't know how to answer that la. How to answer?"

I just told Jastin to follow my blog. I think I scared him into saying yes. He says that he'll read it and comment.

He's reading the blog now. Good boy!

Cats on chest

2009-02-27T18:45:00.003+08:00

Finally. I can blog about Jaya. Not that I've been dying to...but she merajuklah, saying that I don't blog about her.

Jaya has got some cats on her chest...and Karr Wei says that she thinks it's wrong, the way Jaya has been touching herself.

"No!" says Jaya in a fierce voice that we don't often get to hear.

"Okay, Karr Wei thinks that it's indecent the way she's touching herself," says Karr Wei, prompting me to write it on my blog.

Jaya gets defensive.

"Indecent is not the word. She's getting into character," says Jaya.

"Not that I've been dying to? Hey, that's not nice," says Jaya after reading the first line of my entry.

"Hey, this is my blog. You can't dictate me," I retort.

"I feel like taking off my bra," says Jaya....but when I want to type that in, she says no.

So I say to her," Hey, masa aku tak blog pasal you, you marah. Now that I'm blogging about you, you're censoring me left and right."

"I'm looking at you with my editing eyes," she warns me.

"Sharmila, I think my buttons are going to pop out," says Karr Wei as she sends an SMS. I look at her. Not really pop out la..maybe get a bit loose kot.

Jaya is looking at the screen now. Then she looked at me. Now she's not looking.

It's very hard to please Jaya. This might just be the only blog about her.

"Why must women get period ah?" asks Jaya. Now she checks her phone. "Why? Why? Why? Don't say why?"

Jaya is talking to herself now.

"Why don't you just get pregnant? Then you won't get period," advises Karr Wei. "Keep getting pregnant, then you'll never get period again."

Jaya says something (*I really didn't catch what she was saying*)

Karr Wei is having a conversation with Christina.

Top three things you should know about Jaya today:

What did you have for lunch: Pork balls noodles soup
Overall feeling for the day: Physical pain and panic
The first thing you'll do when you get back home: Take off my clothes, shower and read my books. (Additional information: she'll be wearing clothes and socks)

Kata pepatah for the day (courtesy of Christina): Dress in stripes.

As per no one's request...

2009-02-26T18:03:00.002+08:00

I was thinking about not blogging for a long time. Why? Simply.

But of course, Martin wouldn't have it that way. He says that his friends have been complaining that the blog is not updated...so here I am, updating it.

IY is behind me, playing the guitar. Earlier, he was messing around with the keyboard I brought into the office today.

We're planning to start a band. Unfortunately, IY is the only one who knows how to play the musical instruments. I guess the rest of us will be clapping along to the beat...and singing out of tune here and there.

What should we name our band? Do drop in your suggestions. Yes you. I know you read this pathetic blog...so tell me your suggestion, aye?

IS was raving about the TV series, SKIN just now. It's full of nudity (old uncles and aunties - according to IY) and sex...almost like porn...but with a story line. The DVDs are with NC now. I'll be watching them next week kot...after I finish watching Lost. I'm gonna watch Season 4 soon. Can't wait.

It's damn cold here. It's like living in a freezer...that is if living in a freezer would be like this. I have three jackets/sweater/cardigan draped over my chair but I'm too lazy to move and pick one up and wear it. How much do you think I should pay someone to do it for me ah?

I was reading a post on MSN on how celebrities stay thin. Apparently one of the reason is because they have personal chefs. Well, I know the cook at Chettynad and he personally brings out the fried chicken for me and NM/PY/IY/IS/ but why am I not skinny like the Hollywood celebrities?

P.S: I love Malaysia and everyone living in Malaysia (Mat Rempits, snatch thieves, people who double-park and leave to do their errands and come back 30mins later and don't bother to apologise, my neighbour who always gives me the look when Bobby Brown pees on his flower pot...everyone!)

I also believe in Rukun Negara and follow it all the time. I also wear seat-belts and don't run red lights. I love Malaysia and I'm happy to be a Malaysian. Please don't arrest me.

Headache - Part 2

2009-02-18T18:04:00.002+08:00

Just got back.

Hmm, where was I? Oh, the Lost DVDs...so yeah. I just met Michael and I asked him what's wrong with the DVD. He said that I should bring it back so that he can go and complain to the seller.

I'm in 3A now. I'm here because there's no one in Level 1.

Karr Wei is on my left. On her left is Yoke Teng. Karr Wei says that I'm a 'sin-capitalizer'. I can't tell you what she meant by it because it involves 'illegal' matters. But she said that I should mention that she mentioned it...so there.

Oh. I just got back from an interview with a lady...who has the worst set of teeth on earth. It's so jagged and wide apart, that throughout the interview, I could only think about how the hell she brushes her teeth.

I'm sure her toothbrush gets stuck in the gap and she has a painful time trying to retrieve it every morning...

Martin is on my right. He just said that he's a leftist..so he shouldn't be on my right. He thinks it's funny...he's looking at the screen now.

"He thinks you're one of the best drivers in the basement," says Martin. He's making a phone call now. He's giving me a weird look.

He said, "Hi!"...now he's having a conversation...and giggling like a girl.

Back to that lady with the terrible set of teeth. Her dentist will never need an x-ray to see the condition of her teeth..coz they're all out there.

Yoke Teng is saying something to Karr Wei. Karr Wei is drinking 100 Plus. She's biting the straw.

Martin is still talking.

"Should I care...I'll tell you about her later. It takes a whole book. You know, the person who sabos me by trying to put stuff on my bag...no..the other one...yes, I don't know," says Martin.

Okay, I didn't mean to eavesdrop..but he was saying it loud enough so that I could hear them all.

Top three things you should know about Karr Wei now.

"It used to be four..why is it three now?" asks Karr Wei.

Martin just came next to me...and he looked at my screen..and said "Oh, my god!"

I'm trying to convince Martin to read my blog.

"How's Ian ah?" he asks.

He says that I should probably mention that he's fascinated with Ian and that it's a shame he cut his hair. Things will never be the same again. He also said that my writing reminds him of Goebels.

Back to Karr Wei.

What did she have for lunch today: Fried rice
Her overall feeling: Sleeping and sick of work.
First thing she's going to do when she gets back home: Open the fridge.

Martin says he will pass a hat around so that they can collect enough money to buy me a life.....

Headache - Part 1

2009-02-18T17:42:00.003+08:00

I'm having a serious headache. I know why. I lack sleep. I know why. Because I've been watching episode after episode of Lost. I wanna finish watching them all by end of this week. But there's a glitch in that plan now....Disc 3 of Season 3 is not working!

Aiyah..cannot continue this post...Karr Wei is calling me to teman her to the pillar of sanctity and hope. Gotta go.

Spoilt brat!

2009-02-13T18:43:00.002+08:00

Okay...I'll make this quick.

Had lunch with IS, NC and the two French kids at a Japanese restaurant at Jaya 33. It was damn funny looking at Bill (that's what IS calls him as she can't exactly pronounce his French name) trying to pick up soft tofu with a chopstick on each hand.

Fast forward five hours later...NM and IY were going over their Valentine's Day plan and NC was talking about how he's going to bring six hot chicks to dinner tomorrow.

As NC was clearing my story (which was terrible, I have to admit), I asked him what's wrong with me. Actually, he could've pointed out a million things that are wrong with me...but he didn't. I asked again, "Why am I writing crappy stories nowadays?"

He replied," Like I said yesterday, you're too complacent."

"But I don't understand what complacent means!" I said. NC gave me a look. I understood what that look meant.

"You enjoy doing other things at work more than what you're supposed to do...which is writing. I told IS yesterday that you walk over my head," he said.

"Actually, you're right," I agreed.

"Sometimes you just act like a spoilt brat," he added.

I couldn't agree more. So I just smiled.

"I can only tell you these now because you're in a good mood. If I tell you on other days, you'll be so defensive saying that I'm picking on you and bullying you," said NC.

OMG...NC totally knows me!

"You're not a bad writer...you're just a terrible employee," he ended.

Fast forward one hour after that conversation....I went to Karr Wei to tell her my 'problem'. She said "You're a spoilt brat!"

Wow, I heard it from two different people on the same day! But I'm not a spoilt brat!!! I'm just used to doing things my way.....

Fast forward thirty minutes after I spoke to Karr Wei...I went to MG and told my 'problem'.

"Can't you see. I'm busy playing Word Challenge!" she said. End of story.

In trouble...

2009-02-12T18:14:00.003+08:00

IS issued a severe warning that I shouldn't blog during working hours. It's 6.10pm now...I think it's okay kot.

It's my fault for asking her to read the blog in the first place. I'll take the blame. I know she's reading this...so I'm going to say "I love IS. She's the best boss ever."

I know NC is also reading this. So I'm going to add "I love NC. He's the best boss ever as well."

Oh, before I forget. I'm so emotional right now. I asked for Lost Season Two and Three from Michael yesterday and he left the DVDs with his secretary!!! He actually remembered! I feel so...you know, happy.

And there I was, earlier, saying that he didn't remember because of his age. I totally take it back. He's the best. I'm the forgetful one...no, let's make that Martin.

I asked Martin to become a follower of this blog..but he said he'll only do it if IY converts to Islam. Yeah, like that's gonna happen soon.

Karr Wei is on my left. She's waiting. We're having dinner with Xin Yi in Commons.

"Can I go first, so that she won't be waiting for too long?" asks Karr Wei. I say "Okay". Karr Wei just left.

I'm alone here. Okay, not really. There are many people on this floor.

Haters...

2009-02-12T15:09:00.003+08:00

It's only been a week and I already have haters. They (or she to be precise) are calling this blog a TRANSCRIPT!

"This is beyond pathetic. Just because I don't want to leave a comment, you are typing it out yourself!"

"Post that! Post that!" screams IS.

"Stop blogging!" she adds. And gives me the 'look'.

NC is standing behind me now. He's laughing while listening to IS ranting away.

She's coming. I have to go.

I'm back

2009-02-12T12:42:00.002+08:00

I want to be honest here...I was actually thinking about letting this blog go. But Xin Yi has been bugging me all day today to update my blog. So here I am.

I'm not going to talk about Thaipusam. If you want a preview on hell...just go to Penang. It's so bloody hot, depressingly humid and unbelievably suffocating! There's like no air...and the only wind you can expect there is from someone's ass!

I'm on 3a now..there's no PC available downstairs. I haven't told NC and IS that I'm up here. Most probably they're thinking that I'm still at my morning assignment....unless they've checked my updates on Facebook.

Xin Yi is on my left...no wait, she's not there any more. She's talking to Jacobus now. On my right are Martin and Richard.

Ing Yeen just asked if I wanted to have lunch. I said.."Can wait 5 minutes, ah?"

Xin Yi is back. She's reading Saturday's newspaper.

"Are you sad ah? You look so sad..." says Xin Yi. "No lah, I'm just tired," I reply.

I stop to think for a second.

"Yes ah? I look so sad is it? It's so 'suay' to look sad for no reason," I tell her. So, I'm plastering a fake smile on my face now.

Xin Yi is clicking the mouse. Ing Yeen just stood up. She's sitting again. Dollah is talking to someone. He's loud.

Jacobus just walked past me.

It's damn cold up here. I'm going for lunch.

Late entry

2009-02-05T18:59:00.002+08:00

Sorry for not blogging earlier..I was malas.

There was only one thing on my mind the whole day today - whether I should buy the RM209 Charles & Keith handbag which was probably made in Balakong (information provided by NM who heard it from her bf).

That's why I couldn't sit still and write an entry..until now. Oh, and also I couldn't find a PC next to Karr Wei or Xin Yi...which is why I don't have any info on them today.

Just finished a conversation with IS...who encouraged me to get over my silly fear of drowning and just swim. Easy for her to say..it's not her who's fated to drown (an astrologer told me that that's my way of death). But I'm going to take her advice anyway...might as well be happy when I'm drowning. Looking forward to my next swimming lesson.

This is my last entry for this week. Going to Penang tomorrow.

Good luck to Karr Wei and Xin Yi on their orange throwing endeavour this Monday. Hopefully they'll meet their tall, dark and handsome dude.

p/s: Any tall, dark and handsome dude (or anyone who knows guys who fit the bill) reading this entry, pls leave your phone number and email add. They'll contact you soon.

p/s2: Short, fat and not-so-handsome dudes may apply...but don't get your hopes up too high.

*The format of this entry is a little different that the previous ones. That's because Karr Wei said maybe I should try blogging about things that had already happened - not just the ones that happen as I'm blogging*

Kata pepatah for the day: If you need to pee, don't hold it in.

Sam is here...

2009-02-04T18:24:00.002+08:00

Sam is here. He got here like about three minutes ago. Right after he came, he curi some murukku from somebody's desk.

"Sedap la. You bring wan ah?" asks Sam. "No," replies Karr Wei. Silence.

"You leave that time, call me ah.." says Sam.

Four things you must know about Sam...like now!

Fav food: Fast food
Fav singer: "I don't have fav singer. All sort of music also I listen."
Gift he likes to give people: "Anything that the person likes. So, I'll get them that."
Least fav colour: Pink

"Thank you, Sam," I say. "You're welcome," he replies.

Tak jadi...

2009-02-04T18:00:00.002+08:00

Karr Wei asked me to write this. "Say 'Karr Wei is very upset but she cannot say what because it's unprintable'".

Now I'm intrigued.

Anyway, I can't write about Jaya because she's not here.

Karr Wei just said something that I can't type. Now she says,"We need to change." Hope you guys get the idea of what she's trying to say.

"Eh, try this sweet," says Karr Wei.

I just took one...and it's orange-flavoured candy.

"Do a review about the candy," adds Karr Wei.

Orange Candy
("It's from Hong Kong by the way," she says. "If you want that piece of information."

The Orange Candy tastes very much like Mandarin orange...which I suspect it is. Right now it tastes a little soury, but I hope that as time passes by, it'll turn sweet. The candy is square...like a box. Smaller and thicker than Sugus.

(Two seconds ago, Karr Wei gave me a funny look. Most probably questioning my sanity."

Karr Wei is on my left. She just laughed. Oh..she's reading this blog. She's currently biting her pinky finger..and now closes her mouth as she tries to hide her laughter. She coughed twice.

Nobody is on my right. Shaari is on the phone...he's walking behind us, talking loudly as if nobody's here. He just laughed. He just laughed again.

Top four things you should know about Karr Wei now...at this moment.

Fav phrase: Your head. No lah.
Least fav food: Sashimi
Fav colour: Olive green (so fancy)
Fav number: 18

*Karr Wei thinks: "Sharmila's phone just rang and her ring tone is like BLEEDING loud!!"*

Sorry, I was distracted by a phone call from PY. Drama with IS's phone. Drama over.

Kata pepatah of the day (courtesy of Karr Wei): Be careful what you write on Facebook. Your boss might be reading!

Bored already...

2009-02-04T17:31:00.002+08:00

It's like what? The third day I'm doing this and I'm already bored! But, I know I have fans out there that I cannot disappoint...so I'm going to get over myself and do this for them.

And by fans, I mean Yoke Teng and Christina.

Now - I'm sleepy. Very sleepy. IY is behind me..typing something. PY is also here..but I can't see her because she's behind that huge pillar thingy.

I'm staring at my phone..hoping that I'll get a message from my swimming instructor saying that she has terrible migraine (again) and has to cancel the class.

Daughtry's 'What About Now' is going on...we've heard this song so many times today that we're thoroughly annoyed by it.

I'm wearing an all-black ensemble today.

Jaya wants to be mentioned in my blog. So I gotta go up and see what's she's doing...so I can blog about it as she does it.

Toodles...for a bit.

Correction

2009-02-03T15:33:00.000+08:00

Xin Yi just read the blog. Apparently she said "Pretty Girl"..not "Busy Girl" like what I had typed earlier.

The CD berhantu cannot be read on this PC as well. Now the CD-ROM is spinning like gila and we don't know how to stop it.

If anyone asks...it's Christina's fault. Right now she's Facebooking. Yoke Teng is waiting for a page to load..but it's taking a long time. She's holding a green pen on her left hand. She just asked "Did you see my comments?"

I said "Not yet".

Updating..

2009-02-03T15:17:00.000+08:00

I'm back on level 3A....I came up to send my artist request form....you know, that panel IS asked me to do.

I'm sitting on Christina's left. On my left is Yoke Teng... and I just asked her how she wants to be referred to on my blog. She said "Yoke Teng."

Christina is having a crisis. Her CD is stuck in the PC. She's looking for a safety pin...but since we don't have an aunty here...she can't find one.

Xin Yi asked her to get a paper clip from Esther. Christina managed to open the CD-ROM. The CD is still spinning. I ask her to close it, just in case the CD flies out and cuts someone's face. Chrisitina obliged. She closed it. Then she opened it again. I pressed the CD down while she pried it out. Drama over.

I asked Xin Yi how she wants to be known. She said "Whatever"...then she added "You don't use whatever ah!"

I asked Jade what name she wants me to use...Xin Yi sibuk and answers "The Busy Girl". Then I gave her a look...for being sibuk.

I ask Jade if I can use JC. She said "Okay".

Brian is talking to Nelsen.

Nelsen just said "Hi". Christina told me to include him in the blog. I said I just did. Nelsen looked at the screen and said "Out of no where!"

Christina is trying to get one fo the CD-ROMs to play her CD. But tak boleh. Christina just said "Bodohnya".

I offered to try the CD on this PC. Put the CD in. It's reading.

Gotta go. Christina wants to use this PC.

I can't write

2009-02-03T14:45:00.001+08:00

Remember that article I said I was going to finish in an hour...like at 10am? Guess what, I just completed it. IS is clearing it now..or should I say..rewriting it.

OMG! I have no idea what's going on with my writing..but one thing's for sure. I can't write!!!

I really hope this is a temporary setback (though if you ask IS or NC, they'd say that it's been going on for at least a year)...or else I have to move to a department in which it's longest article is eight para long.

Anyway, NM is back to sitting on my left. She's...ermm...Facebooking. IY is on my right..at least 5m away...checking something colourful on the net. My eyesight is screwed..so I can't really see what's on the screen..a bunch of red and green boxes.

PY is at NC's place...

N'Sync's 'Tearing Up My Heart' is going on right now. Janitor is polishing the floor.

NM just wiped her right eye...and she just flipped back her hair. Now she's clicking her mouse.

IY just scratched his left ear...now his back....

PY just looked at her notebook on the table before typing something.

I'm wearing white Adidas sneakers...NM is wearing black high heels...IY is wearing white Converse sneakers...IS is wearing something that's hurting her feet (tu la...nak sangat berfesyen)..and PY is wearing...I can't see from here.

IS just called me. She wants me to do Thursday's panel...I said "Yeah". Then she asked me to print out the pics. She said "Thanks."

Gotta go.

Morning post

2009-02-03T09:21:00.000+08:00

Hallo.

I'm all by myself now. Trying to start and finish my article in less than one hour. I can do it.

Got two comments on my blog already. Wow, I knew this is going to be popular...but I didn't expect it to be this fast.

To the first commentator: Yes, this blog is going to be everywhere.
To the second commentator: Don't be a hater! I just know how to micro-manage my time..=)

Okay..I'm also very perasan.

PY told me that something very interesting happened after I left yesterday. We got complaints saying that we were not removing the sex spams from our forum. High-intensity drama....damn, I missed it! If not I could've blogged about it.

Met a foreign worker in the lift just now. He got off on the same floor as I did. He turned around and looked confused. He spoke in a funny language (okay, the language wasn't funny, but the way he talked was. Have to be politically correct nowadays. Banyak susah) to me. I couldn't understand a word...(obviously).

Excerpts from the 'conversation'
Me: (sign language) Hand to mouth - Look at him questioningly
He: Nods
Me: Show two fingers, point downwards.
He: Ah, ah, shows two fingers and points downwards.

After three minutes of exchanging improvised and made-on-the-spot sign languages, I figured out that he's a new canteen staff and wants to get to the cafeteria...

And all that excitement so early in the morning! It's going to be a great day.

It's mine

2009-02-02T16:56:00.000+08:00

I've decided not to share this blog with Christina. It's mine. All mine.

Now I'm back on the first floor. NM is on my left. She's busy typing away...most probably not work..=) Let me see...hmm, yah..she's typing something on Facebook.

PY is on the phone right now...she just said "Thank you, bye!". Now she's behind me, talking to NM..asking a question...NM looks befuddled.

I just asked PY's and NM's permission if I could mention them in my blog. NM said "as long as it doesn't incriminate me for not doing my work."

PY just walked away...after taking a pineapple tart from the tray between NM and I. Now, she's quarelling with NM over some murukku. She dropped some on the floor...she picks them up and throws them into the dustbin.

IS just called NM into the room - it's been 3mins now...she's still in there.

Anyway, Karr Wei asked if I wanted to go makan porridge steamboat. Aku tengah mengantuk gila...but for the sake of bonding with friends..I said yes.

I love Britney Spears. I wish I could do 500 crunches a day like she does.

NM is back.

"It's so crunchy it makes my ears pop," said PY about the murukku.

I wonder if anyone will read this blog...and if I'll have a following like those popular bloggers.

I just realised that it doesn't matter. This blog is crap...I'm just doing it for fun.

Kata pepatah for the day: Don't shit if you can't stand the smell.

Why are you reading this?

2009-02-02T15:14:00.000+08:00

Christina is undecided. She doesn't know if her screen name should be Gray Whale or Purple Whale. Personally, I don't think it matters because at the end of the day...she's a whale.

She's looking at the assignment roster now. I'm sitting on her right typing this. This is what we do when we have nothing to do.

Things on top of Christina's mind:
Number: 11
Day: Tuesday
Actor: I don't know

"Can we stop and pass? Don't you have nothing else to do?" asks Christina. I tell her to look at our blog because it already has four paragraphs!

Christina is busy Facebooking. She's clicking on something but the page is loading very slowly. She looks frustrated. Now she's typing a reply to a message she received on Facebook. She's scrolling up..and down..up...and down.

I'm calling Karr Wei now...it's ringing..but she's not picking up.
Christina is clicking away..she has so many windows open on her desktop that she's having a hard time finding what she wants to see.

She's typing the second line of her article. The photos were taken by Chan. We think that Andrea Fonseka looks nice. Now that she's lost all that weight.

I'm thinking about what to write. But I have no clue. I shouldn't be here in the first place. I should be at my place on the first floor and complete my own work. But I'm here.

Christina just scratched her head. I told her that. She said, "You gila."